I wasn't prepared.

The worst phone call I've ever received came last night around 8pm. First of all, when I realized it was coming from Parris Island, I didn't even realize it was actually my daughter! Secondly, she spoke so fast that the only things I understood were: recruit, Parris Island, do not send me anything, I contact you soon with my new address. I think I'm still trying to process it. I didn't get to say ANYTHING!!!! When she stopped speaking I rapidly said,"I love you" but I honestly don't even know if she was still on the line.

When I could finally stop crying long enough to breathe my first thought was I needed to talk to someone. I wanted to call Leah, but I haven't talked to her since before Christmas, so I called Tara instead. Somehow I knew she would help me & of course, she did :0) I felt a lot better after talking to her for a few minutes. Today I think I'm going to call the recruiter and ask him if he knows what the hell Lauren said to me, I figure it hasn't been that long ago that he made that call himself & I'm guessing it's a standardized call.

I know she needs my support. I know I'm going to have to be strong, but honestly, if she calls me & tells me to help her get the hell out of there... I'll cave. I'll fill up the van & drive to Parris Island and snatch her away from the Marines. Ok, I'm lucky, I have a strong support system. Tara's husband is a former Marine & he has tried to prepare both me & Lauren, but there just is not a real way to prepare ANYONE for boot camp.

The first letter goes out today. I know in her call she said not to contact her, but her recruiter said he's writing to her this week, so I'll be damned if I'm not going to write to her. I have the majority of her address. When the twins came in from school I asked them if they had told their friends that their sister had gone. Jamie said no, but that everyone knew. When I asked how he knew he said their teacher had told everyone. Of course, I asked how their teacher knew, and both of them asked me if I had called him. I said no, so they thought maybe Lauren had called him. It dawned on me how he knew, I'm buddies with the teacher's father in law & he must have passed the information along. Anyway, an entire 1st grade class is aware that Alex & Jamie's sister has gone to the Marines.

God this is hard!